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BLOWING SMOKE: A Snapdragon Sentinel Investigative Election Report

BLOWING SMOKE: A Snapdragon Sentinel Investigative Election Report

For the past several weeks the staff here at the Snapdragon have been investigating the somewhat extraordinary claim that any and all votes not cast for Donald Trump will automatically be awarded to Hillary Clinton.

Our editor was pretty confident that such an idea was blatantly false, since it flies in the face of math, physics, and any other science we have used to make sense of the world, but our investigative arm obtained permission to dig deeper, to look beyond the surface to see what might lie underneath.

The team called upon every ounce of journalistic knowhow and used every contact they had cultivated in their years of scouring the streets for stories. But it wasn’t until one reporter uncovered secret government documents concerning extraterrestrial life and the government’s longstanding and long-concealed relationship with them that progress was finally made.

Another journalist sacrificed sleep, sanity, and their good-standing in their local diocese in order to delve deep into some ancient organizations and their...questionable rituals, relics, and blood oaths. What he found was nothing short of horrific.

These two separate leads began to coalesce into a much bigger, darker picture as the investigation progressed. Days upon days were spent looking into the backgrounds and histories of third-party and independent candidates and clear, incontrovertible connections were made obvious. In the end, there was only one possible explanation for it all.

We’ve been had.

The American people have been hoodwinked and, yes, it’s true. Every vote not cast for Donald Trump will actually be awarded to Hillary Clinton.

And it gets worse.

Here, in one comprehensive flow-chart is the summation of our findings and the terrible reality in which we find ourselves:

 

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